Lonely Mormon

Lonely Mormons

far from home

wandering through the great apostasy.

Tempted by Coca Cola,

shunning coffee and other like beverages,

is your truth too good for me?

You all rush to share it

with the pretty Asian girls.

Was there nothing on

those buried gold plates

Elohim wanted you

to share with me?

I’ll just have to cross my own desert.

Not for the first time.

The Day I Failed My Personality Test

You wanna test

my personality,

You say you’ll make a

man of me,

Wanna check the level of

Dianetic technology

required to set

me free

from the engrams that

bedevil me.

I’m very sorry,

Mr Scientology

in the words of Boy George

I’d much prefer a cup of tea.

Lazy JW

Hey Jehovah

why don’t your witnesses like to climb over

the hill and visit any more?

I never seem them

they don’t call

they don’t tuck the WatchTower

under my door.

It is a big hill,

I suppose.

The Death of Reverend Moon*

Reverend Moon

you have died.

Have you opened your eyes?

Did you get a surprise?


(*Well, American-ish)


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